You’ve Gotten Her Number: Should You Stay Or Should You Go?

how to get her numberThere are two schools of thought about this question.  On the one hand, leaving right after you getting a girls number makes it look like the whole point of talking to her was to get her phone number.

Which makes you a self-validating prick who isn’t interested in adding genuine value to her life.

Don’t make her think you wanted her phone number more than you wanted her.

By continuing to talk to her, you strengthen the connection and build more attraction.  This is an important point if you’re getting a lot of phone numbers, but never get your calls returned.  Or worse, getting them answered but never getting a date (or a hookup) out of it.

Once you build more attraction you’ve dramatically increased the chance that she’ll call/text you back.  Each new thread of conversation weaves a stronger bond between you.

The more investment she makes (in time, in emotional currency) the more she is going to want a return on that investment.  Like picking up the phone when you call and saying yes to a date.

Besides, nothing is more awkward that constantly running into a girl the same night you got her number.  If you’re going to leave, LEAVE.  Don’t hang out in the same place.


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An Opposing View

In most cases, you should be asking a girl for her number toward the end of a conversation.  Asking for it in the middle is a little anti-climactic.  There’s something to be said for anticipation.

You can’t build desire by being completely available to a woman.  There’s a great lesson in the movie, The Tao Of Steve.  He surprised women by doing something impressive and then disappearing.

It always made the next encounter more resonant because the woman had a chance to absorb her experience with him and then build suspense for the next one.

So what’s the answer?  Should you stay or should you go?

Go.  It’s always better to leave on a high and leave them wanting more.  But again, if you’re getting flaky responses (no call backs, reticence when you do reach them, etc.), then you need to spend time building more attraction before you leave.

In the next post, we’ll figure out how to make first contact (with her, not aliens).  In the meantime, figure out where you are on the ladder (and what to do if you fall off).

If you missed the last post, read it here.

By | 2017-02-02T19:53:10+00:00 March 30th, 2017|Dating Advice For Guys|0 Comments

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