How to Talk Dirty in Bed – and Why You Should

Talking dirty in bed Just like talking about a delicious meal can make it tastier, erotic talk can make sex more appetizing.  Most people think “talking dirty” is a vulgar, in-your-face prison-style accounting of what you want to do behind closed doors.  But it’s just as often a delicate, tender expression of your love.

Talking erotically means different things in different contexts.  It can deepen love or heighten lust.  It can help you access sexual fantasies, express your emotional bond, or simply reveal all that is naughty within you.

It can be an observation you make of your partner’s body, a compliment of her love-making, a narrative of what’s going on, a preview of coming attractions, an anticipatory exclamation, a sigh, a moan, or a cry.

Talking dirty to her is an expression of what you like, a communication of what you want or an appreciation of what was delivered.  It’s the language of love and it can rise to the sky or descend to the gutter.  It can be aggressive or tame, naughty or nice, instructive or illuminating.  It is many things but it is always expressive.

How To Dirty Talk

Erotic talk starts before the clothes come off and doesn’t end until you pull the sheets over you.  Sexy talk brightens every phase of the sexual experience. Here are examples of how to start a dirty conversation (and finish it!):


  • “I love running my fingers through your hair”
  • “You have amazing legs.”
  • “I want to kiss every inch of you.”


  • “I love feeling you get wet.”
  • “I love it when you do that.”
  • “Do you like it when I touch you here?”


  • “You taste so good I could do this forever.”
  • “You feel so good with me sliding in and out of you.”
  • “I love the sounds you make when you come.”

Post Sex

  • “That was amazing.”
  • “Come closer, I want to absorb everything we just did.”
  • “Have I told you lately how much I love you?”

Talking dirty in bed doesn’t have to be dirty.  As you can see there’s a lot more to it than the lunatic ravings of a horny junkyard dog (although there is much to say for that, too).  Learning the art of sexy talk is easy.  All you have to do is…

Notice the sensations in your body.  Express them.

Ask for what you want.  Talk about it.

Anticipate how good it’s going to feel.  Breathe heavy.

Think about your fantasy.  Voice it.

Notice her body.  Compliment her.

Does it feel good?  Tell her. 

Do you like the way she’s touching you?  Moan.

Are you getting hard?  Groan.

Are you close?  Announce it.

Erotic talk is about reflecting, creating or intensifying passion through sounds and words.  It’s caressing your lover with language.  Erotic talk is an important part of rebuilding your sex life because…

Erotic Talk Keeps You In The Moment.

“Talking Dirty” makes sex fire on all five cylinders.  Sex is terrific with taste, touch, sight and smell, but talk brings it all together.  A four-cylinder engine will take you where you want to go but adding a fifth will get you there quicker and the ride will be more memorable.


Our readers enjoyed: Talking Dirty To a Woman


Passionate sex is about creating and releasing energy.  Talking is energy– in the form of noise vibrating in distinct patterns and pitches.  You don’t just hear sound, you feel it.  There’s scientific backing for this.  Speaking or hearing sexually charged words is known to spike dopamine transmissions in brain chemistry, triggering sexual excitement.

Erotic talking is a release of pent-up energy.  It gives voice to our innermost desires in ways that our bodies can’t.  It creates energy not just by the physical vibration or your emotional intent, but by prompting your partner to respond.

Energy feeds on energy.  Every word you say builds a step your partner climbs up on.  And everything she says builds a step for you to rise.  Keep climbing.  Heat rises.  Sometimes words get in the way but other times they pave the way.

In our next post, we’ll help you get started, one dirty word at a time.   In the meantime, before we get to the words, read 6 tips for sexy sounds in bed.

By | 2017-01-31T11:55:05+00:00 January 31st, 2017|Talking Dirty For Guys|0 Comments

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