What To Do When Things Go Wrong.
Most of the women you text will not be psychic. As a result, you will need to be direct, and use your words to set expectations. Taking this step will avoid hurt feelings and preserve your excellent reputation as a decent human being.
Let’s say you are extremely interested in a woman. Clarity will
go a long way. If you cannot text for long, state that upfront (“meeting the guys for trivia in a bit. Just wanted to see how your week is going.”). Do you just want to get to know her better? Ask specific questions. Do you want a date? Ask her for one. Do you want a hook up? Steer the conversation in that direction. If you have been texting aimlessly, then call the question.
She has a concrete choice. How she responds next will determine how you proceed. Here are some possibilities:
Good Things To Text A Girl
Example 1: *Crickets*
You’re done. Do not send an additional text. She answered you with a non-answer. Not the most forthcoming approach, but it’s time to move on. BTW: a woman who does not accept your offer is not a bad person, so don’t paint her with that brush. She is merely a person who did not accept your offer.
Example 2: *Crickets* for an extended period of time, followed by an “I’m pretty busy” message.
This is a variation on Example 1. Note her failure to make a counteroffer. She’s saying no, for whatever reason: she’s “busy” marrying another guy tomorrow, dealing with emotional issues, entering witness protection. You don’t need to get angsty over it. Just note the headline and back away. You can respond by not responding, or send a wrap up/closure text like, “Understood” or an I-see-what-you’re-doing “We’ve all been there.”
Example 3: *Crickets* for a loooooong time, followed by an emoji, or “what’s going on?” or any other message that does not directly address your date offer.
Nope. It ain’t happening. Are you willing to continue this intermittent back and forth? If so, proceed at your own risk.
Example 4: Those dates/times don’t work for me, but how about the sneaker exhibit at the High that Sunday?
She lobbed the decision back into your court. She wants to see you. Well done!
Now: let’s say that your interest in a particular woman starts to wane. This could happen for a number of reasons. Perhaps you’ve decided to focus on someone else. Perhaps she is the human equivalent of a tranquilizer. Perhaps she has an Ayn Rand lunchbox. Don’t make the rookie mistake of overcompensating, and showering her with conversation (or worse: compliments) because you feel obligated to keep going. Can you disappear with or without an explanation? Absolutely.
But if you disappear, please ghost like a proper person. You should not suddenly text her after a prolonged absence just because you later become bored, lonely, or overserved (with alcohol, etc.). It is disrespectful to her: she has not been in a Snow White-ish coma during your absence. She’s been texting and seeing other men, hanging out with her friends, and possibly winning the Nobel Prize. If you liked her that much two months ago, you should’ve/could’ve/would’ve done something about it. But you made a reasonable decision to vaporize. That’s fine. Just stay gone (from her) and move on (to someone else who may be perfect for your girlfriend-y and/or hooking up needs).
Remember: women do not owe you a text and you do not owe them a text. And good news: there is more than one woman for you to text, so govern yourself accordingly. If a woman responds to you in a disappointing manner, decelerate. If you lose interest in her, stop. But if she responds to you encouragingly, and you like her, accelerate.